When nursing, I feel there's nothing else I'd rather be doing. I quit my job because the company didn't support pumping at work. It's been two years and I sill think it's worth of it.
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| "It's nice that now mommy works from home." |
Like all the other breastfeeding mothers, I've been told to cover up when nursing in public. Last time when I was asked to do so, I told my 2-year-old. "This lady wants you to hide under the blanket while eating. Would you please?" And he shouted, "NO!"
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| "After all, picnic is all about sun shine and fresh air." |
Even when we were covered up, I'd still be told to go to somewhere else to breastfeed. Last time when I was asked to do so, I told me 2-year-old, "This gentleman wants you to eat in the restroom. Shall we move?" And he replied, "Tell him go away."
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| "I'm eating here in the food court. You may move to the restroom as you please." |
For sleep training purposes, the books told us, “as baby drifts off, gently remove breast.” But my baby always wakes up immediately when I tried to remove the breast.
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| "I'm now fully awake." |
My mom told me that the size of my boobs will never be the same again—they’ll get bigger. But she didn’t tell me that the shape of my boobs will never be the same, either.
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| "And I wonder if mom has always been this fat." |
Whenever trying to “nurse down” my fuzzy baby, I was always the one who was “down” first.
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| "Mommy is sleepy. I'm not." |
Soon I learned to keep my smart phone close by, so that I can watch “Case Closed” and stay awake while breastfeeding.
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| "...I thought mommy's working. Actually she's watching 'case closed.'" |
I even learned to pick up my smart phone with my toes when it’s not possible to move my upper body and breastfeed at the same time.
As long as I give him his bed-time nursing session, my child can sleep a straight nine hours. It's nice, but in the morning I had to beg him to get up and eat because my boobs were engorged.
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| "...zzz..." |
It hurt so badly to breastfeed when my baby was teething that I swore numerous times to myself, “I will wean him tomorrow.” But I never really carried out the plan. Now we are done with breastfeeding, it actually feels weird not to have hydrogel pads on my nipples.
My little one was only breastfed once a day as part of his bedtime routine by the time he turned two years old. To wean him naturally, after his second birthday, every night I'd ask him, “Do you want mama’s milk or cow’s milk?” He always chose mama’s milk. After three months, one night he decided to try chose cow’s milk. Several days later he wanted to switch back to mama's milk, only realized there was no more milk in my breasts.
The last scene of our breastfeeding journey was like this: he latched on, sucked for a few minutes, and then he opened his month, looked up to me and said, “there’s no milk.” “That’s because you’re a big boy now, and mama’s milk is for babies,” I told him. He hugged me (my breasts actually) and said, “bye bye booboos.”
I’ll remember this forever.
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